Professional mascot you say??? Let’s get the MASCOT TOP 20 out of the way real quick:
TOP 10 OFFENSIVE
1. So what is your real job?
THIS
2. Is that full time?
YES
3. What do you do in the off season?
WORK
4. Can you show up ‘here’ for free?
NO
5. Can I have some tickets?
NO
6. How long are you going to do this?
JULY, 2016
(you know what they say about hind sight;)
7. What are you going to do when you are done?
THIS
8. How much money do you make?
NOT ENOUGH
9. Why are you a bear?
Because a Rocket would look like…OH NEVER MIND.
10. Do you hang out with ‘this’ star player?
NO
TOP 10 BENIGN
1. Is it hot inside there?
YES
2. Is it hard not to talk?
NO
3. Do you sweat a lot?
YES
4. Do you have a fan or ice pack in there?
NO
5. How do you see?
EYES
6. How do you pee?
PENIS
7. Are you a girl or boy in there?
MAN
9. How does someone get into that line of work?
ACCIDENT
10. Have you ever thrown up in costume? (OK, I just wanted to tell you that one myself;)
YES
THE BLUNDERS from a speech given on 1/19/17 to ALL staff at the Sam Houston Race Park
HAVE ANOTHER LAUGH! CLUTCH & COYOTE HAVE A CHANCE ENCOUNTER AT A DINER & THE MEAL GOES SIDEWAYS!
ROBERT BOUDWIN 